Death Tudor Style - (Medieval Medical Madness)

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Hello bizarre story, friends.
You are listening to The

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Bizarre, a FA place where we
talk about the strange, the

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unusual, and all things bizarre.
A F I'm Alicia, your Hostess for

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today's episode.
And as always, we ask that you

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keep an open mind.
Keep a skeptical year, but keep

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on listening to those facts as
we take you on our newest

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journey, Death Tutor style.
Tally ho, my cohost with the

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most Kevin.
How are you, my lad?

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I'm doing great, my love.
Oh, you're Scottish?

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Skyrush or Irish?
Oh, I'm Irish.

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Irish health.
Luck of the Irish right now.

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Huh.
Oh, gosh, it's so good to see

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you.
You.

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Too, we get to dress up again,
which I love her costumes so

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much.
It's the best part of us being

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fucking nerds is like doing the
the costumes.

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But you know what I'm even more
stoked about?

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Tell me we are lucky to actually
have a real lady in our midst.

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Yes, introduce introduction.
The host of Fluently Forward,

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Shannon McNamara.
No, great heavens, I'm bestowed

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to be here.
We are so thankful.

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Pleasure.
An absolute pleasure.

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Welcome, Shannon.
Yes, welcome.

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Thank you so much.
I'm so psyched to be on here.

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Your podcast has been.
I've been listening to it

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constantly for the past couple.
Of years.

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You guys taught me how to say
voodoo correctly.

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Voodoo.
Voodoo.

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Yeah, that.
Was.

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Something I like, didn't know,
like I love it.

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I love it all.
Well, I'm a floozy.

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Yeah.
Thank you for listening.

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I'm a fellow floozy.
There we go.

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Which are Shannon's ladies,
right, you guys?

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Have to have a name like the
Bizarre Heads or something.

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Yeah, we'll think the bizarre
test we can do votes.

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Some of your votes, Yeah, Even
if it's what do you want?

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To call yourself, you know,
motherfuckers, I'm just joked to

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be here and and to have you here
with us drinking some.

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Cheers.
Yeah, some Kava like Kava and

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fucking.
Being.

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Nerds, cheers.
So tell us something weird,

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Alicia.
I'm.

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I'm happy to tell you something
weird.

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OK?
Whoever beverages in hand, gonna

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get weird.
King Henry the Eighth.

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January the 8th.
Not the 7th, 6th or 5th or 4th.

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No or third or second or first.
9th Not the ninth.

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OK, not.
The 9th, The 8th.

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Specifically, what do you guys
think of when you first?

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I think of a song.
Yes.

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And Ray the I I am, I am.
That's about all I know.

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I love that.
I think of someone who gets

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around town.
I think of someone who would

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have used Tinder today.
Yeah, I think of someone who

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liked to spread it around and
yeah, get that seed out there.

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I mean, he definitely did that,
yes.

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Seed.
Yeah, he wanted to plant the

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seed for sure.
His wives are another popular

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thing that people think of.
So he was the king of England

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and he was well known for those
six wives that there's a

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Broadway show right now that's
going on called 6 The Musical

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about this.
And it's just the six women his

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wives.
So each one have like it's kind

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of like Hamilton, honestly.
OK, I don't mind the music of

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it, but I heard the music.
Of this musical, Yes, I'm that

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person, yes.
We know we.

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Know you.
I can't believe you even.

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Asked that question.
Yeah, right.

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So I've listened to it, but it
feels kind of like Hamilton

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here's hot take.
Okay Six is just riding on the

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coat tails of Hamilton.
Bum bum bum, yeah.

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But it's not the Kotels.
It's the tampon string.

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It's like women only, you know?
Yeah.

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Totally on the tampon string,
yeah.

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I like to ride on the tampon
string sometimes.

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Why not?
It gets your place.

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So he was, he had six wives.
First wife, you know, was with

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another woman, right?
He liked to get it out there, so

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to say.
And he's married to them all at

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the same time, right?
No.

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So Mary's divorces, Mary's
divorces.

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Yeah, because he is a good
Christian boy.

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Sure.
Or a Catholic boy at this point.

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Got it.
He ends up going to the Pope and

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saying, hey, I need to get my my
relationship or my marriage

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annulled.
The first time the 1st.

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Time Okay married to his first
wife.

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Okay, got it, the Pope says.
Nope.

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And then?
I think that needs to be a

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tshirt.
It does.

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Pope says no, and it led to the
English Reformation.

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So the English Reformation is
where King Henry changed the

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religion of England.
In order to get a divorce, to

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get a divorce, so they became
Protestant.

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He creates the Church of
England, which he is the head

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of.
Sure, go figure.

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So the real question is, how
good was it the to the poon

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Tang?
The poon Tang.

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Yeah, to drop an entire
religion.

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I've never had sex that good
before.

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Yeah, but I'm sure it's out.
There sex.

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But.
Do all of that.

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Yeah.
Have you ever had sex?

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So good it makes you want to
like, form an LLC?

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This is like one step above it.
I was like, ah, fuck, like build

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a church.
You.

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Know.
Like, yeah.

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Never.
Not yet.

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Not yet.
Not let's.

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Hope one day we all experience
you know nothing on what.

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Yeah, sex so good.
You want to build a library?

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Damn it.
Good for him.

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Well, so that's what had ended
up happening.

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And Henry, the images of him we
always think of.

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You know, you see the older
versions of Henry when he was a

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king for a while, but he was an
before that.

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He was an avid outdoorsman.
He loved hunting.

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He loved playing tennis.
He loved jousting, being on a

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horse.
It's kind of giving Robert

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Baratheon from Game of Thrones,
you know, like he was the

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strapping warrior.
But then he became king and he

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kind of just started drinking.
Yeah, yeah.

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I never watched the show.
No, I'm Can you give me either?

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Okay.
No, but I'm just but that is my

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perception that's.
What I would think, yeah.

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But trust me, it's accurate.
And now that you told me that

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I'm gonna, like, slip in fake
characters, I'll be like, I was

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totally like Queen Turley
learned, you know?

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Oh my gosh.
She's the best with her mice.

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Yeah, she had all these mice is
like.

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Magical mice.
Yeah, I would fucking believe it

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for sure.
So okay so he was.

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He was an avid outdoorsman, but
the depictions of him today we

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see more of a rotund guy.
He, you know, a nice way to say

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is jolly, but really he was not.
Santa Claus shape, you mean?

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Yes, Santa Claus shape.
Yeah, he was more rotund and not

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the original Henry that that he
was at the beginning of his

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reign, so in January.
Typical hot king that you the

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hot and he was.
That's exactly very charismatic,

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very like would bring people.
His speeches were known to be

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just amazing.
He was a great king.

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Everyone loved him before
January of 19.

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I said 19151536 January 15.
He's risen again in the 1900s,

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In the 1900s, Henry's back.
So in January of 1536 he was

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knocked off of his horse with a
Lance blow.

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The horse actually fell on top
of Henry and he was unconscious

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for.
Hours now.

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This was a massive jousting
accident that his actually, his

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inner circle were like, he's
never going to recover, he's

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going to die.
But that like the saying, the

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good die young, he recovered so
he had severe head trauma and he

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was knocked unconscious for
hours.

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I honestly, who really knows
because inner circles will keep

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this information pretty secret,
but he was at least he was

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knocked out for a few hours.
That's what they're willing to

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say.
But what happens to

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personalities with severe head
trauma, right?

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Yeah, they do like a 180 and
it's always usually for the

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angrier.
It's never like I had like a

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head wound and now I like give
to charity all the time.

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Like now I tell stand up jokes.
It's always like I became an

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asshole.
Totally, yeah.

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Yeah, exactly.
I'm gonna sit here and eat and

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be a Dick.
Yes, it's always an asshole.

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So you guys are right.
It's medical professionals today

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who look at his case file say
that his personality changed

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because of that head trauma and
that is why the tyranny that he

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is often associated with his
subject as well as his his wives

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occurred was because of that.
So in addition to this head

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injury, Henry also suffered
injuries injuries to his leg and

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this would result in open ulcers
that would that were formed on

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his leg for the rest of his
life.

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So back during that day they
used to think like a healing

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wound was bad.
So in order to have something

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heal properly and you wanted it
to have like open air and you

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would constantly like cut.
Open the wall.

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Shut up.
Yeah, yeah.

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So he had like these like
bulging like bandages and stuff,

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isn't?
That crazy, like how they

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thought that back then.
Because like when it heals, like

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it heals, you know what I mean?
Like the ideas people, even with

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like leeches, like sucking out
the bad blood.

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Like.
It's just so strange.

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It's.
So barbaric, yeah.

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Sorry.
Yeah, well and so this is also

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the time, like you said,
leeches.

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Also the time of bloodletting
and bloodletting was where they

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would release blood thinking it
was poisoned and trying to

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create like oh once we let all
this bad blood, the good bloods

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going to come in which like.
I kind of do get that.

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Like, I know, I know.
It's like I.

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Didn't know anything.
Like, you would think that, oh,

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I totally would have been like a
believer.

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00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:22,560
I'd be like, makes sense, you
know?

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Yeah.
I I mean, I I do see that.

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Like, maybe.
But also these people were so

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sick and it just kind of made
them more complacent because

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they're all anemic And for.
Yeah, exactly.

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It's like, oh, no, this is what
This is how this is healing.

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They're being healed.
So it's like, by the way, do you

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00:11:39,110 --> 00:11:41,910
ever get those ads on TikTok
where they're like, you have too

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00:11:41,910 --> 00:11:44,750
much like poop in your system,
so you need to take these

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00:11:44,750 --> 00:11:47,910
vitamins that like do a colon
cleanse because like one day

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00:11:47,910 --> 00:11:50,270
they're going to look back on
that and be like, no, like poop

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00:11:50,270 --> 00:11:53,790
is in your system until like,
you can never be fully poopless.

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00:11:53,910 --> 00:11:56,190
You know, like you can't not
have.

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00:11:56,190 --> 00:11:58,430
So we still kind of do these
things to this day.

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00:11:58,550 --> 00:12:00,830
I mean, that's really true.
Have you ever done, have you

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00:12:00,830 --> 00:12:02,550
guys ever done like a super
dieter's tea?

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00:12:03,010 --> 00:12:05,370
No.
No, I've heard though, that like

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you did it.
Does that just flush you out?

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00:12:08,650 --> 00:12:11,730
Oh my God.
We just, like, I'm doing it

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right now.
I was gonna say I would have to

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have something here at the
moment and it would not be

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comfortable.
I thought I was dying.

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00:12:20,090 --> 00:12:22,170
I'm not even kidding.
I honestly thought I was dying.

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When I took it.
I was like, Oh yeah, sure.

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00:12:24,250 --> 00:12:25,610
I'll try this.
Super Dieters tea.

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00:12:25,610 --> 00:12:28,210
It's a tea that you drink.
It has some kind of herbal like

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00:12:28,330 --> 00:12:31,630
yeah, mix that just.
Is this an ad?

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You're like and we have a code
too.

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00:12:34,910 --> 00:12:35,390
Bizarre.
Yeah.

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00:12:36,110 --> 00:12:40,030
When you're checking out of.
Yeah, it is not pleasant.

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00:12:40,030 --> 00:12:43,750
It hurts your stomach.
My mom actually once played a

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00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:47,590
trick on someone on a road trip
and gave them some dieters.

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00:12:47,670 --> 00:12:50,990
No, I think that's one of those.
On a road trip?

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00:12:51,110 --> 00:12:54,110
Yes, you had to drive like 7
hours.

229
00:12:54,110 --> 00:12:55,510
Well, no.
You're punishing yourself

230
00:12:55,510 --> 00:12:57,910
because now you have to be in
the car with that person.

231
00:12:57,910 --> 00:13:03,510
No, she was not in the.
Car, can you say sadistic awful?

232
00:13:03,510 --> 00:13:12,150
Yeah, so awful.
Anyway, digress, so, so

233
00:13:12,150 --> 00:13:17,830
bloodletting.
So he, he had always had these

234
00:13:17,830 --> 00:13:22,280
sores on his legs and over the
next 10 years it they were never

235
00:13:22,280 --> 00:13:24,560
healed because they're
constantly being opened up by

236
00:13:24,560 --> 00:13:27,160
his physicians saying this is
what we need to do for the rest

237
00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:29,880
of your life.
He would actually survive more

238
00:13:29,880 --> 00:13:32,640
than one occasion where
infection from these wounds

239
00:13:32,680 --> 00:13:37,000
risked his life.
And they said I believe it, yes.

240
00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:40,400
Cutting yourself back open,
getting infected.

241
00:13:40,640 --> 00:13:43,120
It's like they had antibiotics.
Yeah, I know.

242
00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:44,800
It's so true, right?
It's awful.

243
00:13:45,250 --> 00:13:48,370
So that jousting, accident,
accident really affected his

244
00:13:48,370 --> 00:13:52,570
whole life and he was unable to
be active after his injury.

245
00:13:53,490 --> 00:13:56,370
And this is something else that
we see with former athletes,

246
00:13:56,370 --> 00:13:58,370
right?
Like so, who are unable to be

247
00:13:58,370 --> 00:14:00,050
active but have always been
active.

248
00:14:00,450 --> 00:14:04,610
Their appetites don't change.
So they're so used to being

249
00:14:04,610 --> 00:14:06,810
active now.
They're sedentary, but they're

250
00:14:06,810 --> 00:14:09,490
still consuming all of these
calories.

251
00:14:09,530 --> 00:14:10,130
Right.
Yeah.

252
00:14:10,570 --> 00:14:13,170
And this motherfucker loved rich
foods.

253
00:14:13,290 --> 00:14:18,260
Loved them so much.
So his waist was 54 inches wide.

254
00:14:19,300 --> 00:14:21,340
That's pretty big.
Very big.

255
00:14:21,500 --> 00:14:24,460
He's a big boy, yeah.
Short King, Big Boy.

256
00:14:24,620 --> 00:14:29,900
Yeah, and.
And then actually 400 pounds he

257
00:14:29,900 --> 00:14:33,610
was, they were believing that he
was about £400 like towards the

258
00:14:33,610 --> 00:14:37,210
end of his life.
I saw years ago when I went to

259
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:39,890
England to like some of his
armor, like in the later stage

260
00:14:39,890 --> 00:14:43,530
of his life, and it was like.
It's like when they put Shrek in

261
00:14:43,530 --> 00:14:47,530
armor to, like, rescue Fiona.
It's like, whoa, it was like,

262
00:14:47,690 --> 00:14:50,210
well, it was all made for, but
yes, yeah, it was all made for

263
00:14:50,210 --> 00:14:51,690
him.
And like you saw it, like

264
00:14:51,890 --> 00:14:54,210
tapered out for this huge
stomach.

265
00:14:54,530 --> 00:14:56,690
My God, they also did that with
Robert Baratheon.

266
00:14:56,690 --> 00:14:58,810
I'll send you guys a clip.
Trust me.

267
00:15:00,210 --> 00:15:03,420
I believe you.
Yeah, even though I'm a little

268
00:15:03,420 --> 00:15:06,180
skeptical because I.
Use like the the breastplate

269
00:15:06,180 --> 00:15:09,020
stretcher or something.
So maybe they use that for King

270
00:15:09,020 --> 00:15:10,860
Henry too.
Maybe he was based off of him.

271
00:15:10,900 --> 00:15:13,780
Actually, he probably was, yeah,
because didn't he base a lot of

272
00:15:13,780 --> 00:15:15,940
his characters?
I think he did off of like,

273
00:15:16,100 --> 00:15:18,500
yeah, tutors and like a lot of
those kingdoms.

274
00:15:19,860 --> 00:15:27,060
So probably they're interesting.
So over time there were lots of

275
00:15:27,060 --> 00:15:31,420
measures that were introduced
into to account for his feeling

276
00:15:31,420 --> 00:15:33,450
health.
They had wheelchairs like

277
00:15:33,450 --> 00:15:37,090
towards the end of his life that
were constructed to move him

278
00:15:37,090 --> 00:15:39,650
around the palaces.
And of course once people start

279
00:15:39,650 --> 00:15:43,090
seeing the king being wheeled
around, rumors start spreading.

280
00:15:43,130 --> 00:15:45,010
Sure.
And things were great.

281
00:15:45,010 --> 00:15:47,170
Yeah, it was dangerous back in
those days to let people see you

282
00:15:47,170 --> 00:15:49,770
were sick or, yeah, you know,
and then you start getting

283
00:15:49,770 --> 00:15:51,610
mutinees and.
Yes, yeah.

284
00:15:51,610 --> 00:15:52,930
And people will try
overthrowing.

285
00:15:52,930 --> 00:15:53,890
Yeah.
Yeah.

286
00:15:53,890 --> 00:15:58,450
It's not good.
They had like their own version

287
00:15:58,490 --> 00:16:04,840
of elevators, so he would be
like wenched up to upper levels

288
00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:09,760
in the castle.
Yeah, it's like a whole team of

289
00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:12,720
men, just like pulling him up in
secret.

290
00:16:12,720 --> 00:16:14,520
Of course they would do it at
night so no one could see him

291
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:21,480
and those who knew him knew that
he was a broken man, but in a

292
00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:22,680
shadow of his former self,
right?

293
00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:28,400
He was this like attractive, you
know, really inspiring ruler

294
00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:30,680
that was completely fucking
broken by the end of it.

295
00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:35,280
So a little more than a year
before his death, he actually

296
00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:39,960
attended a parliament on
Christmas Eve in 1549, and he

297
00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:42,520
delivered an address, and it was
really him at his finest.

298
00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:48,450
He had a throwback to that
charismatic side of him and he

299
00:16:48,450 --> 00:16:50,690
was basically saying we need to
come together because there's a

300
00:16:50,690 --> 00:17:11,250
lot of like religious issues.
Is it gonorrhea?

301
00:16:53,930 --> 00:16:55,850
So he was trying to bring his
people together and say we need

302
00:16:55,850 --> 00:17:01,290
to come together, be humble and
and you know, come together for

303
00:17:01,850 --> 00:17:06,650
England really.
So another thing that he was

304
00:17:06,650 --> 00:17:09,369
known to have contracted this
because we're getting close to

305
00:17:09,369 --> 00:17:12,750
the end of his.
Very close.

306
00:17:12,790 --> 00:17:16,230
OK.
I was just assuming syphilis.

307
00:17:16,710 --> 00:17:18,990
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
That was gonna be my second

308
00:17:19,390 --> 00:17:22,710
syphilis.
So he had syphilis because he

309
00:17:22,710 --> 00:17:24,670
had so many affairs.
He had six.

310
00:17:24,950 --> 00:17:28,150
He just had six wives, OK?
Not to mention all the affairs

311
00:17:28,150 --> 00:17:31,190
that he was having.
So would this pussy leg.

312
00:17:32,340 --> 00:17:36,500
And being hoisted up to like a
bedroom.

313
00:17:36,500 --> 00:17:38,980
He was still banging.
He was still banging.

314
00:17:38,980 --> 00:17:40,940
I'm guessing there was a lot of,
like, Cowgirl.

315
00:17:41,220 --> 00:17:42,580
Yeah, that's exactly what I was
thinking.

316
00:17:42,580 --> 00:17:44,740
I'm like, I'm thinking he wasn't
doing much of the work.

317
00:17:46,220 --> 00:17:48,940
Yeah, he's like picking someone
up against the wall in the rain.

318
00:17:48,940 --> 00:17:53,860
Like no, that was pre joust.
Yeah, definitely not pose joust

319
00:17:54,060 --> 00:17:57,420
he well.
And could you imagine with that

320
00:17:57,420 --> 00:18:00,220
like those bandages and OK.
The smell.

321
00:18:00,340 --> 00:18:03,300
The smell, yes.
Maybe they were like

322
00:18:03,540 --> 00:18:05,420
bloodletting.
They're like, this is he's like,

323
00:18:05,420 --> 00:18:07,860
this is like the bad cum and
like I have to get it out.

324
00:18:08,860 --> 00:18:10,900
So, like, we have to be doing
this, you know?

325
00:18:11,180 --> 00:18:12,460
Yeah.
Anything for you, Sire.

326
00:18:15,460 --> 00:18:19,860
So he also so you had syphilis,
he had smallpox, right?

327
00:18:20,420 --> 00:18:24,640
And they think that he suffered
a series of strokes because of

328
00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:28,440
his his diabetes and his his
blood pressure.

329
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:29,920
Damn.
So this guy was.

330
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:32,120
Dude was jacked.
He was so jacked.

331
00:18:32,120 --> 00:18:34,920
And then on top of that, he
loves rich foods.

332
00:18:34,920 --> 00:18:36,360
He's fat.
He has gout.

333
00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:39,160
It's actually kind of crazy that
like he didn't just die because

334
00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:41,760
back then, you know, it's not
like they could put you on these

335
00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:45,280
antibiotics or like these blood
thinners, like he was just white

336
00:18:45,280 --> 00:18:47,800
knuckling it through like 9
different chronic conditions.

337
00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:51,200
Yeah, and and you.
Fucking miserable.

338
00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:57,280
How do you have the energy?
No, no, I think, I think I have

339
00:18:57,280 --> 00:18:58,720
a.
Cold and I'm like, stay away.

340
00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:03,520
I just want.
To lay in bed, it's like eating

341
00:19:03,520 --> 00:19:05,040
a cherry.
I'm getting his Dick sucked.

342
00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:07,880
He's like, everything's fine.
Give me some.

343
00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:11,560
Just just pour it right into my
gullet.

344
00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:14,080
Fetch me some more.
Like, what the fuck?

345
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:18,520
So his last days were said to
have been horrendous.

346
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,960
He wasn't even able to speak.
Like he couldn't speak at all.

347
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:28,060
And he was bedridden, of course,
the stench from his rotting

348
00:19:28,060 --> 00:19:33,660
flesh, because we still have
that infected leg that has never

349
00:19:33,660 --> 00:19:36,540
not been infected for years.
Because they keep cutting it

350
00:19:36,540 --> 00:19:41,620
open, letting everything out.
They said that it was so bad

351
00:19:41,620 --> 00:19:46,820
people would get sick from the
smell, so they had to burn like,

352
00:19:46,860 --> 00:19:48,540
OK, how do you cover up a smell
today?

353
00:19:48,540 --> 00:19:52,020
We have Febreze, we have
Poopery, we have, you know,

354
00:19:52,220 --> 00:19:54,500
different things to cover it up.
What do they have done?

355
00:19:55,040 --> 00:19:56,880
It traps the odors.
It doesn't mask them.

356
00:19:58,360 --> 00:19:59,600
That's.
Right.

357
00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:01,920
Like herbs, Dried herbs.
Herbs.

358
00:20:01,920 --> 00:20:03,960
That's a great gas.
Do you have any gas?

359
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:05,840
Incense.
Incense.

360
00:20:06,420 --> 00:20:08,980
You know, incense.
And it was like fucking rocks

361
00:20:09,020 --> 00:20:10,380
and shit.
Worthy incense.

362
00:20:10,380 --> 00:20:12,380
Yeah.
And of course they probably had

363
00:20:12,380 --> 00:20:16,460
like poultices, like herb, like
salve mixes on his running

364
00:20:16,460 --> 00:20:20,060
flesh, but like, but it was this
like heavy.

365
00:20:20,540 --> 00:20:25,460
Air of stank, stank and fucking
incense.

366
00:20:25,580 --> 00:20:27,860
It's like smelling.
It's like when you go take a

367
00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:31,220
shit and you spray the flower
spray and it's like now it just

368
00:20:31,220 --> 00:20:35,380
smells like flowery shit.
So gross.

369
00:20:35,780 --> 00:20:37,420
That's why I think.
This was always have matches in

370
00:20:37,420 --> 00:20:40,620
the bathroom, yes, but then also
it's like, well, now everyone

371
00:20:40,620 --> 00:20:42,420
knows they took a shit because
it smells like that.

372
00:20:42,460 --> 00:20:45,820
There's really no good, yeah,
but the pooperie are supposed to

373
00:20:45,820 --> 00:20:48,140
spray into the water.
Yeah, before.

374
00:20:48,300 --> 00:20:49,980
Yes, yeah, I love how we all
noticed.

375
00:20:50,420 --> 00:20:53,220
Hell yeah, Can we?
I saw that commercial and I was

376
00:20:53,220 --> 00:20:54,700
like, I'll take a four fat.
Thank you.

377
00:20:55,140 --> 00:20:59,860
I need one for my purse.
The world is my toilet.

378
00:20:59,860 --> 00:21:07,820
Now can use anyone, so people
are walking in his like inner

379
00:21:07,820 --> 00:21:10,860
circle are gagging from this
mall.

380
00:21:11,580 --> 00:21:13,500
It's hot.
It's disgusting.

381
00:21:13,660 --> 00:21:16,300
At what point don't you just
kill the king and say I'm can't

382
00:21:16,300 --> 00:21:17,940
do anything?
You can't.

383
00:21:18,580 --> 00:21:20,980
Fucking talk.
He's paralyzed.

384
00:21:21,140 --> 00:21:23,820
They were at least pretty loyal.
At the end, I would be like, I

385
00:21:23,820 --> 00:21:25,020
give up.
What's he going to do?

386
00:21:25,020 --> 00:21:27,020
Fire me?
He can't move, you know?

387
00:21:27,020 --> 00:21:30,780
So good for them.
Yeah, they they really like.

388
00:21:30,940 --> 00:21:33,580
They really stuck by him.
That's some loyalty that we all

389
00:21:33,580 --> 00:21:35,660
want.
Yeah, Ride or die, baby.

390
00:21:37,540 --> 00:21:45,020
So he actually finally ends up
dying on January 28th 1547 at 55

391
00:21:45,060 --> 00:21:51,220
years old as a result 55, not
55, as a result of renal and

392
00:21:51,220 --> 00:21:55,060
liver liver failure.
Among other things, yeah, like

393
00:21:55,300 --> 00:21:59,100
an entire lifetime of shit.
And like, normally when you hear

394
00:21:59,100 --> 00:22:01,180
about King Henry the Eighth, you
just hear about his wives and

395
00:22:01,180 --> 00:22:03,880
you hear about how crazy he was,
but you don't really hear like

396
00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:06,320
potentially why he was so crazy
and hear about.

397
00:22:06,360 --> 00:22:08,680
The pussy and not the puss, you.
Know yes, yeah.

398
00:22:09,360 --> 00:22:11,880
You have a pussy and not the
pussy.

399
00:22:13,120 --> 00:22:17,440
But like honestly I get why.
Just brushing.

400
00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:20,400
Brushing my hair while you're
talking because I'm not used to

401
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:26,640
my long luxuries.
So yeah, I mean, I think it's

402
00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:28,600
interesting that we never hear
about this.

403
00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:31,880
Or like, the fact that his his
fucking leg smelled so bad that

404
00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:39,080
people would gag around it.
He's making his chambermaids

405
00:22:39,160 --> 00:22:34,280
gag.
Like, that's fucking

406
00:22:34,360 --> 00:22:36,720
interesting.
Yeah, he's making woman.

407
00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:42,560
Everyone's gagging around him
well and he he really was trying

408
00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:48,040
to stay alive for a while
because there was huge questions

409
00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:49,080
and who's going to take over
the.

410
00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:50,600
Oh yeah.
Did he have a son?

411
00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:53,520
So that's why he had also so
many wives.

412
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:56,560
He kept on trying for a son and
like, I think that one of his

413
00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:58,800
wives had a son and that was
still birth.

414
00:22:59,250 --> 00:23:02,410
But he had daughters.
He had Elizabeth.

415
00:23:02,410 --> 00:23:05,850
Well, that just won't do.
Yes, a woman could never be a

416
00:23:05,850 --> 00:23:11,490
ruler.
Never so, so he has this son.

417
00:23:11,490 --> 00:23:14,250
But the son has always been
known to like kind of be in ill

418
00:23:14,250 --> 00:23:17,370
health.
And because of that, he's like,

419
00:23:17,370 --> 00:23:20,650
well, let me wait until he's a
little bit stronger to like pass

420
00:23:20,650 --> 00:23:22,850
the throne on.
He ends up getting the throne

421
00:23:22,850 --> 00:23:27,130
when he's a child.
And he had, they don't really

422
00:23:27,130 --> 00:23:30,770
know exactly what he had, but he
definitely had some kind of like

423
00:23:30,770 --> 00:23:33,810
pneumonia or something that was
never, never really went away.

424
00:23:34,610 --> 00:23:40,370
And he ends up dying, leaving
his sisters up to get the

425
00:23:40,370 --> 00:23:43,330
throne.
He says who he wants to get the

426
00:23:43,330 --> 00:23:44,610
throne.
That's not very interesting.

427
00:23:44,610 --> 00:23:47,930
Who ends up getting the throne?
Is Queen Elizabeth the First.

428
00:23:48,410 --> 00:23:53,590
So that's Henry's daughter.
It's actually Anne Boleyn's Ann

429
00:23:53,590 --> 00:23:56,110
Bolin and King Henry.
Their union.

430
00:23:56,110 --> 00:23:59,910
Is Queen Elizabeth the First.
What do you guys know about her?

431
00:24:01,950 --> 00:24:04,310
God, Nothing.
I don't think I do either.

432
00:24:04,350 --> 00:24:07,190
I just don't know anything.
No, I have terrible history in

433
00:24:07,190 --> 00:24:09,470
that.
I'll give you a brief overview.

434
00:24:09,470 --> 00:24:11,630
Okay.
Super synopsis.

435
00:24:11,670 --> 00:24:13,590
Like Cliff notes, Yes, super
synopsis.

436
00:24:13,910 --> 00:24:17,750
So she was one of the longest
reigning monarchs.

437
00:24:18,230 --> 00:24:21,430
Just spoiler alert, longest
reading monarch.

438
00:24:21,670 --> 00:24:25,190
Aside from the Queen Elizabeth
of yesteryear just there just

439
00:24:26,870 --> 00:24:32,310
but she was around when the
Shakespearean like revival, they

440
00:24:32,310 --> 00:24:38,470
call it the Elizabethan period.
She was very into building up

441
00:24:38,470 --> 00:24:42,030
the Armada like the Navy, the
English Navy.

442
00:24:42,350 --> 00:24:45,110
She also and she was working
with Spain quite a bit.

443
00:24:45,110 --> 00:24:48,760
They were kind of lots of art.
Shakespeare was huge.

444
00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:55,600
She was huge into fashion and
beauty, and really a nickname

445
00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:57,440
that she had was the Virgin
Queen.

446
00:24:58,280 --> 00:25:01,960
Yeah, which is interesting, but
I kind of wanted.

447
00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:03,400
Sorry, random question.
Real quick.

448
00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:06,000
Let's, let's ask it, yeah.
What?

449
00:25:06,040 --> 00:25:08,680
How old was she when her dad
died?

450
00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:12,640
Do you know, I want to say she
was like 1819?

451
00:25:12,640 --> 00:25:17,680
She was, she wasn't super.
She was like in her late teens

452
00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:19,720
to early 20s.
And since he didn't have a son,

453
00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:21,600
they're like he did have a
science.

454
00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:26,400
Oh, the son took the throne.
Oh, and the son died.

455
00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:28,440
Oh.
OK, there was a vacuum.

456
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:34,040
And so she ended up with her
people, ended up taking the the

457
00:25:34,320 --> 00:25:35,760
throne.
Yeah.

458
00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:37,440
What did she?
Look like, was she pretty?

459
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:42,680
She was known to be beautiful.
She had red hair, like super red

460
00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:45,900
hair.
I feel like there have been

461
00:25:45,900 --> 00:25:48,540
shows that have portrayed her,
yes.

462
00:25:48,540 --> 00:25:50,780
Just like.
That like there was the show the

463
00:25:50,780 --> 00:25:54,660
tutors.
And I know, Oh my God, she plays

464
00:25:54,660 --> 00:25:57,460
Marjorie Tyrout.
Natalie Dormer was in it.

465
00:25:57,580 --> 00:26:01,140
But I don't know who she plays.
I just imagine everyone to be

466
00:26:01,140 --> 00:26:03,660
beautiful.
I know with like low cut

467
00:26:03,660 --> 00:26:06,660
cleavage dresses and velvet and
all the right places.

468
00:26:07,020 --> 00:26:08,300
Boobies off?
Yeah.

469
00:26:08,300 --> 00:26:11,340
Well, and she was really the
person to like set the standard

470
00:26:11,340 --> 00:26:15,000
for fashion.
So like when you think of during

471
00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:18,000
that time, people like would
shave their eyebrows, right?

472
00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:21,280
So she really didn't have much
eyebrows.

473
00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:23,360
She was like super redhead.
Classic ginger.

474
00:26:23,360 --> 00:26:27,640
Yeah, yeah, classic ginger.
And she would like, really pale

475
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:29,640
out her skin like super.
Like you guys.

476
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:31,560
Super.
Yeah, yeah.

477
00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:32,800
She was white.
Yeah.

478
00:26:33,280 --> 00:26:34,480
She was.
She was Elvin.

479
00:26:34,480 --> 00:26:36,740
Yeah.
I feel like I have now seen

480
00:26:36,740 --> 00:26:39,940
Queen Elizabeth almost, although
maybe I'm thinking of like the

481
00:26:39,940 --> 00:26:42,780
Queen of Hearts and Alice in
Wonderland, but I.

482
00:26:42,780 --> 00:26:44,140
Feel like throw powder and.
White, yeah.

483
00:26:44,140 --> 00:26:46,900
Powder.
White face with like red coit up

484
00:26:46,900 --> 00:26:50,220
hair and like a big dress.
Yeah, that is totally, yeah.

485
00:26:50,220 --> 00:26:52,940
The the Charlie and the
Chocolate Factory.

486
00:26:52,940 --> 00:26:56,300
With what is her name, The Queen
of Hearts.

487
00:26:57,450 --> 00:27:00,570
Oh, oh, oh, oh.
The Helen bought Helen about

488
00:27:00,610 --> 00:27:03,130
bottom Carter.
Yes, that is very similar to

489
00:27:03,170 --> 00:27:05,450
what?
An ask type of energy, but

490
00:27:05,450 --> 00:27:08,010
that's very similar to what her
style was.

491
00:27:08,810 --> 00:27:11,410
And she was really setting the
stage she was.

492
00:27:11,610 --> 00:27:14,490
She also had a smallpox, which a
lot of people got.

493
00:27:14,970 --> 00:27:19,570
And in any pictures that you see
of her, you don't see smallpox,

494
00:27:19,570 --> 00:27:21,850
of course, right?
Like you won't see it on Queen

495
00:27:21,850 --> 00:27:26,390
Elizabeth the 1st.
She would cover up her smallpox

496
00:27:26,390 --> 00:27:29,630
scars that were all over her
body, but really over her face

497
00:27:29,870 --> 00:27:36,550
with this really pasty white
toxic paint.

498
00:27:36,990 --> 00:27:42,630
It was lead and mercury that she
mixed in my applying it directly

499
00:27:42,630 --> 00:27:44,870
to her face.
Yeah, hell yeah.

500
00:27:45,710 --> 00:27:48,310
And it was, of course that's
deadly, right?

501
00:27:48,470 --> 00:27:52,650
So she was because she was
insecure.

502
00:27:52,850 --> 00:27:56,490
She also did like another
solution which was applying it

503
00:27:56,490 --> 00:28:01,330
here all over her neck.
She did white lead and vinegar.

504
00:28:02,290 --> 00:28:05,650
Was she not getting sick?
No, she was sick all the time.

505
00:28:05,890 --> 00:28:08,490
Oh, and they're not like putting
two and two together, like,

506
00:28:08,610 --> 00:28:10,450
well, stop putting lid on you.
Think about it.

507
00:28:11,500 --> 00:28:15,540
Every turn there was like a
fucking new like, oh the the

508
00:28:15,540 --> 00:28:17,300
play, a new plague's going to
happen.

509
00:28:17,300 --> 00:28:20,580
So it's like everyone's like
it's such a low standard health

510
00:28:20,700 --> 00:28:24,500
wise that it's like, I'm sure
they were fucking eating lead.

511
00:28:24,740 --> 00:28:26,860
I'm sure that there was like
there was so much.

512
00:28:26,940 --> 00:28:31,700
You know, random facts off
topic.

513
00:28:31,740 --> 00:28:35,180
Lead that they would put, they
would create lead containers,

514
00:28:35,300 --> 00:28:37,260
put liquids.
I can't remember what liquids

515
00:28:37,260 --> 00:28:39,900
they were, but the lead would
sweeten.

516
00:28:40,870 --> 00:28:43,910
The whatever the mixture is, I
can't remember what it was, but

517
00:28:43,910 --> 00:28:45,510
that's how they would sweeten
things.

518
00:28:48,230 --> 00:28:51,390
Containers.
See, That's the thing.

519
00:28:51,830 --> 00:28:54,390
So drink like drinking lead.
They're putting lead on their

520
00:28:54,390 --> 00:28:57,030
face.
That's crazy.

521
00:28:57,150 --> 00:29:00,190
Well, like, like you do.
You just don't know right at

522
00:29:00,190 --> 00:29:01,950
that time.
You don't know that these

523
00:29:01,990 --> 00:29:03,030
things.
That's right.

524
00:29:03,030 --> 00:29:07,040
So when she would apply this
makeup, it was done.

525
00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:10,200
It was like she had an entire
her get ready with me like

526
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:15,040
videos, be like so long.
And she had like an entire take.

527
00:29:15,040 --> 00:29:19,200
Talk videos just for herself.
Get ready with me while I put on

528
00:29:19,200 --> 00:29:21,200
this lead based.
Paint.

529
00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:25,800
Don't worry that premature aging
isn't because of it.

530
00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:31,140
So she would hold this like
pasty white shit on her face for

531
00:29:31,180 --> 00:29:33,380
an entire week.
So she slept in it.

532
00:29:33,820 --> 00:29:36,380
She would never take it off, She
wouldn't clean it or anything

533
00:29:36,380 --> 00:29:40,700
for a week.
And that adds to premature

534
00:29:40,700 --> 00:29:44,000
aging, yeah.
OK, so skin can't breathe first

535
00:29:44,040 --> 00:29:45,840
of all.
Well, at least she had on like

536
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:49,160
sunblock because she's a ginger,
so it's like totally covered,

537
00:29:49,400 --> 00:29:51,440
you know?
Yeah, that's true.

538
00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:54,240
She was very, very, very pale,
very pale.

539
00:29:55,360 --> 00:30:02,200
So she, let's see, she actually
would leave it on and then when

540
00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:07,080
she would wash her face, it was
so aggravated and like, you

541
00:30:07,080 --> 00:30:10,830
know, think of that pink and red
and like you're you're basically

542
00:30:10,830 --> 00:30:14,630
scrubbing this shit off.
It's like an abrasive, like

543
00:30:15,030 --> 00:30:16,590
stuff.
Probably taking a layer of your

544
00:30:16,590 --> 00:30:18,630
skin off.
They said that it was like an

545
00:30:18,670 --> 00:30:22,230
inch thick of paint that she had
on her face, like that's how

546
00:30:22,230 --> 00:30:25,790
much she would put on.
And as she got older, people

547
00:30:25,790 --> 00:30:28,870
would, people would tell her in
her suitors and court like,

548
00:30:28,950 --> 00:30:31,590
court folks are like, Oh my
gosh, you're the most beautiful

549
00:30:31,590 --> 00:30:34,030
woman because she was so
insecure about her looks.

550
00:30:34,860 --> 00:30:38,020
I mean, go figure she looked
really fucking old and she had

551
00:30:38,020 --> 00:30:39,940
all these like holes and stuff
in her face.

552
00:30:41,420 --> 00:30:47,500
So she took wash her face.
She didn't take, you know, soap

553
00:30:47,540 --> 00:30:49,820
and water to it.
No, no, no, no.

554
00:30:50,300 --> 00:30:56,420
She Oh, no, here we go.
She mixed egg shells.

555
00:30:56,740 --> 00:31:00,860
Oh, alum and mercury.
Alum.

556
00:31:01,020 --> 00:31:02,300
What is alum?
It's a.

557
00:31:02,500 --> 00:31:05,070
It's a.
What is that?

558
00:31:05,070 --> 00:31:06,830
Like a mineral?
Yes, it's like, it's like a

559
00:31:06,830 --> 00:31:09,710
mineral, OK, but really, mercury
is the one that fucks you up the

560
00:31:09,710 --> 00:31:12,150
most, right?
Yeah, makes it into a paste and

561
00:31:12,150 --> 00:31:14,470
like, scrubs her face with it.
What is it?

562
00:31:14,470 --> 00:31:16,070
What?
They're fetish with mercury.

563
00:31:16,190 --> 00:31:17,990
Like what?
What the hell?

564
00:31:18,510 --> 00:31:23,150
No, I don't know.
Like these experts today say

565
00:31:23,150 --> 00:31:26,990
that that will like mercury,
putting it on your face will eat

566
00:31:26,990 --> 00:31:28,990
away at your flesh.
Oh God.

567
00:31:29,870 --> 00:31:31,910
But you know what?
We do have like, exfoliants.

568
00:31:31,910 --> 00:31:34,950
Like I remember using these,
like, stride X pads for acne

569
00:31:35,510 --> 00:31:38,430
when I was like, in middle
school that were just breaking

570
00:31:38,430 --> 00:31:41,070
down the barrier of my skin.
But you were like, oh, you don't

571
00:31:41,070 --> 00:31:43,710
want it to be oily for acne?
So instead.

572
00:31:43,710 --> 00:31:47,710
You would just like strip your
skin of everything so too far

573
00:31:47,710 --> 00:31:49,310
removed.
We're not that much better.

574
00:31:49,510 --> 00:31:51,110
I get.
I mean, we're getting a little

575
00:31:51,110 --> 00:31:54,950
bit better now, like, but still
eggshell, like, that's crazy.

576
00:31:54,950 --> 00:31:57,670
That eggshell back then is like
the walnut scrub of today.

577
00:31:58,470 --> 00:32:00,310
Yeah, it totally is.
Or the apricots.

578
00:32:00,510 --> 00:32:03,790
That's what it is.
Yeah, Apricot, Oh my gosh.

579
00:32:03,870 --> 00:32:09,110
I mean, so the fact that there
was lead and mercury that she

580
00:32:09,110 --> 00:32:14,350
was using on a weekly basis was
adding to all of her issues,

581
00:32:14,470 --> 00:32:18,590
health issues, she.
So they say like some of the the

582
00:32:18,590 --> 00:32:20,830
issues, the health issues that
you would have from this, from

583
00:32:20,910 --> 00:32:26,530
mercury poisoning, memory loss,
irritability, depression, now

584
00:32:26,530 --> 00:32:29,850
these are all symptoms that she
was said to have had as she was

585
00:32:29,850 --> 00:32:32,170
approaching death.
At what age?

586
00:32:32,170 --> 00:32:34,330
30?
Yeah, like 70, actually.

587
00:32:34,650 --> 00:32:36,810
Oh yeah.
Yeah, she lives for.

588
00:32:37,010 --> 00:32:39,730
One never of death.
Yeah, she's like putting a

589
00:32:39,730 --> 00:32:42,210
fucking an inch of what is in
there.

590
00:32:42,650 --> 00:32:45,260
There's something in their genes
because.

591
00:32:45,380 --> 00:32:47,500
Actually, maybe Mercury, like,
makes you live longer.

592
00:32:47,660 --> 00:32:50,820
Like I'm just like.
Yeah, now I'm like crazy 70.

593
00:32:50,820 --> 00:32:54,020
Yeah, even like, oh, her lip
stain.

594
00:32:54,020 --> 00:32:59,140
She would do red on her lips and
that was with not fruits and

595
00:32:59,140 --> 00:33:03,300
berries.
Not like pink dye or something.

596
00:33:04,540 --> 00:33:10,360
It was cinnabar, which was a
toxic mineral that contains

597
00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:12,600
mercury.
So everywhere, everywhere you

598
00:33:12,600 --> 00:33:14,680
could possibly see.
Mercury, Mercury, Mercury.

599
00:33:14,680 --> 00:33:16,400
She was not like a glossy egg
girl.

600
00:33:16,400 --> 00:33:19,400
She was like a full beat, you
know, She was a full beat all

601
00:33:19,400 --> 00:33:23,600
the time.
So we'll have a picture of what

602
00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:26,560
they think she did look like, or
closer to what she actually

603
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:28,040
looked like towards the end of
her death.

604
00:33:28,040 --> 00:33:30,480
She just, like, imagined her
uglier because, like, no one

605
00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:32,160
drew her like that, I'm sure.
Well, See.

606
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:34,880
Yeah, Yes, exactly.
No one really drew her that way.

607
00:33:34,880 --> 00:33:36,960
But I'll show you guys.
Yes, OK.

608
00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:39,800
They do kind of get the age in
there.

609
00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:43,160
Yeah, they do, yeah.
So she looks a little wrinkly.

610
00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:44,360
Yes.
And.

611
00:33:44,360 --> 00:33:48,880
Hairstyles are how did any like?
I know we've had some like cess

612
00:33:48,880 --> 00:33:51,200
hairstyles, but how did anyone
think that looked good?

613
00:33:51,200 --> 00:33:55,920
It was so bad.
My God, yeah, this is the old

614
00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:57,600
picture of her.
Yeah.

615
00:33:57,600 --> 00:34:01,040
Her eyes are kind of sunken in.
Also like, that will be me in 20

616
00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:02,760
years.
I'm like, oh, gross.

617
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:08,280
I'm like, yeah, no, I see it.
I see what that looks like and

618
00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:11,199
they so this is a a genuine and
realistic one.

619
00:34:11,440 --> 00:34:14,000
Once again, when you're looking
at this picture, you have to

620
00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:17,320
know that it's probably
photoshopped, like photoshopped

621
00:34:17,600 --> 00:34:21,159
by the artist back then to make
it look a little bit better

622
00:34:21,159 --> 00:34:22,760
because he doesn't want his head
cut off.

623
00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:26,860
Because he fucking, like painted
a picture of her that actually

624
00:34:26,860 --> 00:34:28,860
is realistic.
You don't see any pox scars or

625
00:34:28,860 --> 00:34:31,340
anything like that in there,
which is something that she had

626
00:34:31,340 --> 00:34:35,659
a hard time with.
Another thing she loved sweets.

627
00:34:36,380 --> 00:34:38,260
Loved them.
Relatable queen.

628
00:34:39,100 --> 00:34:45,540
Literally a little relatable
queen, so she would eat them

629
00:34:45,540 --> 00:34:48,810
nonstop, causing her teeth to
rot.

630
00:34:48,889 --> 00:34:52,530
Of course, did she at least have
like a like a pink butt hole or

631
00:34:52,530 --> 00:34:54,690
something?
Or was like everything is like

632
00:34:54,730 --> 00:34:57,050
actually no.
She also had like bunions and

633
00:34:57,050 --> 00:35:00,130
like pancreas sores.
She had warts on her butt hole,

634
00:35:01,090 --> 00:35:02,690
ingrown hairs and shit.
Totally.

635
00:35:04,650 --> 00:35:08,890
So the I I had briefly like,
mentioned and oh, so with her

636
00:35:08,890 --> 00:35:12,770
teeth, she didn't have like any
teeth on like half of her face.

637
00:35:13,210 --> 00:35:16,610
And by the end of her life it
was so bad.

638
00:35:16,610 --> 00:35:19,650
She anytime she would talk
quickly, people couldn't

639
00:35:19,650 --> 00:35:24,410
understand her because she had
like basically no teeth and like

640
00:35:24,410 --> 00:35:27,690
shit was just robbing.
It's like black and all fucked

641
00:35:27,690 --> 00:35:29,450
up.
So you look at pictures of Queen

642
00:35:29,450 --> 00:35:32,090
Elizabeth, just imagine like
meth mouth.

643
00:35:32,930 --> 00:35:35,130
Yeah, that's what I'm picturing.
Yeah.

644
00:35:36,770 --> 00:35:43,160
So I kind of alluded to it
before, which her being called

645
00:35:43,160 --> 00:35:46,120
the Virgin Queen now, of course.
She had.

646
00:35:46,320 --> 00:35:49,880
I think maybe it was not by
choice after hearing all this

647
00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:55,320
stuff.
I mean, like, fucking for sure.

648
00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:59,520
So she, I mean she did the the
Virgin Queen was like really

649
00:35:59,520 --> 00:36:04,040
kind of trying to create control
because what was the control

650
00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:08,560
that she had her throne having
her thrown.

651
00:36:08,840 --> 00:36:11,440
If she took on a husband, then
he would be king.

652
00:36:11,640 --> 00:36:13,360
That would usurp some of her
authority.

653
00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:16,400
So she was trying to keep hold
on to to authority.

654
00:36:16,560 --> 00:36:18,480
Think of like what her her mom
had to deal with.

655
00:36:18,520 --> 00:36:21,080
Her mom had to deal with a ton
of shit.

656
00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:26,240
She was killed early and then
people tried killing Elizabeth

657
00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:28,840
quite a few times because she
was an heir to the throne and

658
00:36:28,840 --> 00:36:30,640
there are other potential heirs
that were.

659
00:36:30,920 --> 00:36:37,070
So she was trying to withstand
any kind of overthrowing her

660
00:36:37,070 --> 00:36:41,990
entire, her entire reign.
Which is why she was like, yeah,

661
00:36:41,990 --> 00:36:46,510
no, I'm the virgin queen.
I'm, you know, I'm untouched.

662
00:36:46,550 --> 00:36:50,110
I'm like this specimen with
rotting fucking teeth.

663
00:36:51,390 --> 00:36:53,670
And do you guys actually think
she was a virgin?

664
00:36:54,010 --> 00:36:56,570
Do you think that that's?
I like to imagine she was

665
00:36:56,570 --> 00:37:00,410
scissoring with her handmaidens
just because, like, I always

666
00:37:00,410 --> 00:37:03,890
like to imagine that.
No, I'm sure she was getting

667
00:37:03,890 --> 00:37:05,370
doinked down.
Yeah, I think.

668
00:37:05,410 --> 00:37:08,850
She got a doinker too, I think
so I think that she probably

669
00:37:08,850 --> 00:37:12,410
did.
There's kind of a fucked up

670
00:37:12,410 --> 00:37:15,650
thing that had happened in her
childhood, which kind of makes

671
00:37:15,650 --> 00:37:18,770
you feel a little bit bad for
Queen Elizabeth the First.

672
00:37:19,010 --> 00:37:23,090
So she was sent to live with
her.

673
00:37:24,060 --> 00:37:26,660
Father's uncle, it was an uncle,
It's.

674
00:37:26,980 --> 00:37:30,340
Always an uncle?
Yes, Thomas Seymour.

675
00:37:30,580 --> 00:37:37,460
So he had married King Henry the
Eighth's first wife, who he had

676
00:37:37,460 --> 00:37:39,340
gotten that annulment from.
Oh.

677
00:37:39,940 --> 00:37:40,660
Wow.
Sloppy second.

678
00:37:41,420 --> 00:37:46,220
Totally so Thomas Seymour and I
think believe it was Ann Parr or

679
00:37:46,220 --> 00:37:51,020
Catherine Parr.
They had had housed her while

680
00:37:51,020 --> 00:37:54,770
his her father was still alive.
They would have tickle fights

681
00:37:55,930 --> 00:38:00,330
and she like Catherine would
hold her down.

682
00:38:00,330 --> 00:38:02,770
And then like there were times
where now you're reading it

683
00:38:02,770 --> 00:38:07,770
today and basically what it's
what it end up saying was that

684
00:38:08,090 --> 00:38:10,610
her like dress was tattered and
stuff.

685
00:38:10,610 --> 00:38:13,690
So he probably was like fucking
raping her while she was a young

686
00:38:13,690 --> 00:38:14,970
child.
Right.

687
00:38:14,970 --> 00:38:18,330
Find this Like, did Elizabeth
write it down in the diary?

688
00:38:18,330 --> 00:38:22,100
Or like confess to someone.
Well I so I think it may have

689
00:38:22,100 --> 00:38:26,660
come out because he let's see he
was actually the IT was the

690
00:38:26,660 --> 00:38:28,140
uncle of her younger half
brother.

691
00:38:28,140 --> 00:38:31,860
OK so he was executed for
attempting to get Elizabeth to

692
00:38:31,860 --> 00:38:34,940
marry him.
So he was trying to get before

693
00:38:34,940 --> 00:38:37,540
Elizabeth took the throne.
He was trying to force marriage

694
00:38:37,540 --> 00:38:38,940
on it.
So it must have come out during

695
00:38:38,940 --> 00:38:43,340
that because he got executed.
He was a fucking pedophile.

696
00:38:44,140 --> 00:38:46,580
She was a child when he took
took her on.

697
00:38:47,700 --> 00:38:51,110
Also she potentially had a
pregnancy.

698
00:38:51,670 --> 00:38:57,350
So a man that she was very
attracted to and loved, She had

699
00:38:57,350 --> 00:39:00,350
his chambers moved right next to
hers while she was the virgin

700
00:39:00,350 --> 00:39:04,750
queen.
And she was, they later say oh,

701
00:39:04,750 --> 00:39:07,470
she wasn't able to make any like
events or anything because she

702
00:39:07,470 --> 00:39:10,430
was swelling.
What does that mean?

703
00:39:11,290 --> 00:39:13,730
She's not swelling.
She's not.

704
00:39:13,730 --> 00:39:16,490
What was that that we were just
talking about with the blueberry

705
00:39:16,490 --> 00:39:19,050
from?
Oh, like the inflation fetish.

706
00:39:19,090 --> 00:39:21,490
Or like woman get like pumped up
or something.

707
00:39:21,570 --> 00:39:24,530
She was definitely not doing
that back in the SO.

708
00:39:24,530 --> 00:39:27,570
She had the baby.
I'm guessing we don't know.

709
00:39:28,010 --> 00:39:29,130
Oh.
We don't know.

710
00:39:29,170 --> 00:39:30,970
That's scandalous.
That is the total.

711
00:39:30,970 --> 00:39:33,570
Skin It's giving a great idea
for an HBO spinoff.

712
00:39:33,850 --> 00:39:34,890
It's like what?
It's giving.

713
00:39:34,930 --> 00:39:36,290
Yeah.
Right.

714
00:39:36,490 --> 00:39:38,090
So she.
Yeah.

715
00:39:38,090 --> 00:39:44,470
So she actually ended up ended
up having to potential pregnancy

716
00:39:44,910 --> 00:39:47,870
as she was getting older.
She was really fucking

717
00:39:47,870 --> 00:39:50,150
depressed, super depressed.
Like there are some people in

718
00:39:50,150 --> 00:39:52,310
her life that were dying.
Well, of course she was like 70,

719
00:39:53,110 --> 00:39:55,630
and she had like these bouts of
melancholy where she would just

720
00:39:55,630 --> 00:40:00,630
like paste the floors and like
not want to talk to anyone hurt

721
00:40:00,630 --> 00:40:03,070
The Earl of Essex, which was one
that one of people that she had

722
00:40:03,070 --> 00:40:06,790
died or had had died.
She during her final day, as she

723
00:40:06,790 --> 00:40:10,910
was saying how much she really
regretted killing some people

724
00:40:10,910 --> 00:40:13,910
because she killed quite a quite
a bit of people like her cousin

725
00:40:13,910 --> 00:40:18,390
Mary Queen of Scots.
She you know the story Mary

726
00:40:18,390 --> 00:40:20,470
Queen of Scots so Elizabeth
killed her.

727
00:40:22,230 --> 00:40:26,190
She was also haunted by visions
of her, of of her own frail

728
00:40:26,190 --> 00:40:31,100
body.
And so she had an idea that,

729
00:40:31,100 --> 00:40:33,700
like there was a playing card
with a nail through its head, it

730
00:40:33,700 --> 00:40:38,180
was found on her chair, and she
was fucking paranoid that that

731
00:40:38,180 --> 00:40:40,380
would mean that she was gonna
die soon.

732
00:40:40,620 --> 00:40:43,380
She had, like all of these
visions of her dying.

733
00:40:44,500 --> 00:40:46,060
She keeps applying that white
paint.

734
00:40:46,060 --> 00:40:52,680
Yeah, there's like more pain.
So she had so many like

735
00:40:52,720 --> 00:40:57,400
emotional and physical issues
that escalated so much so that

736
00:40:57,400 --> 00:41:01,920
she had took to standing, only
standing in her like bed

737
00:41:01,920 --> 00:41:03,480
chamber.
She would not sit down.

738
00:41:04,480 --> 00:41:08,000
She stood for 15 hours straight
before she collapsed on the

739
00:41:08,000 --> 00:41:12,520
floor and her ladies in waiting
covered the whole floor and and

740
00:41:12,520 --> 00:41:15,350
cushions.
She was convinced that if she

741
00:41:15,350 --> 00:41:18,070
sat down or like laid down she
would die, which is why she

742
00:41:18,070 --> 00:41:20,510
would like she was stood up for
15 hours straight.

743
00:41:21,910 --> 00:41:27,190
So she's she laid down and she
could not talk for four fucking

744
00:41:27,190 --> 00:41:30,790
days, just laying on the ground.
And then they finally moved her

745
00:41:30,790 --> 00:41:32,830
into the bed.
They could finally actually get

746
00:41:32,830 --> 00:41:37,670
her to calm down.
She she ended up not really

747
00:41:37,670 --> 00:41:42,280
having a plan, but another thing
that she had felt was there's

748
00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:46,040
this ring that she wore that
signified her chastity and her

749
00:41:46,040 --> 00:41:51,240
like marriage to the the
country, like her virginal

750
00:41:51,240 --> 00:41:54,200
Queens stuff.
She believed that if she removed

751
00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:57,680
that ring she would die.
Like it was she was going to

752
00:41:57,680 --> 00:41:59,840
die.
So she never removed the fucking

753
00:41:59,840 --> 00:42:01,760
ring and like skin grew around
it and stuff.

754
00:42:02,240 --> 00:42:04,760
Sure enough, yeah.
Isn't that disgusting?

755
00:42:04,880 --> 00:42:06,520
Gross.
It's so gross.

756
00:42:06,680 --> 00:42:09,560
Yeah, she would not because she
got older and like, you know,

757
00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:11,000
wrinkler or whatever.
Who?

758
00:42:11,000 --> 00:42:16,000
Who did who?
Wait, who is The Who does?

759
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:17,120
Who's doing?
Who's in Barbie?

760
00:42:17,320 --> 00:42:18,960
Who stars in Barbie, Margot,
Robbie.

761
00:42:19,960 --> 00:42:26,120
She did a movie where she played
Queen Elizabeth the 1st and her

762
00:42:26,120 --> 00:42:28,000
sister.
Queen of Scots.

763
00:42:28,000 --> 00:42:30,840
Queen of Scots was another
actress.

764
00:42:30,840 --> 00:42:35,160
I can't remember her name.
And I remember it's all starting

765
00:42:35,160 --> 00:42:38,120
to come back to me like things
that you're saying like these

766
00:42:38,120 --> 00:42:45,760
kind of these weird behaviors
and she gross skin and gross

767
00:42:45,760 --> 00:42:48,280
fucking skin.
Like she like, just.

768
00:42:48,280 --> 00:42:51,000
I think that you could even do a
podcast just on her beauty

769
00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:53,440
regiment at that time because it
was so fucked up.

770
00:42:54,700 --> 00:42:59,700
But she ends up dying on the
24th of March 1603 and she was

771
00:42:59,700 --> 00:43:02,820
actually 69.
I thought it was 7069.

772
00:43:05,740 --> 00:43:11,620
Virgin Queen, my ass.
So I don't know.

773
00:43:11,620 --> 00:43:13,980
I think that there was something
up with these.

774
00:43:14,340 --> 00:43:16,500
Both of these people, they're
genetically related to each

775
00:43:16,500 --> 00:43:18,140
other.
The fact that they lived

776
00:43:18,140 --> 00:43:22,160
through, I mean literally
painting fucking poison on your

777
00:43:22,160 --> 00:43:26,360
face.
I mean consuming it, having like

778
00:43:26,360 --> 00:43:28,320
open sores your entire fucking
life.

779
00:43:28,320 --> 00:43:30,600
Like these people were made out
of something stronger.

780
00:43:30,920 --> 00:43:34,000
And whatever it is, I don't care
how many babies it takes me.

781
00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:35,640
To get it.
But I will.

782
00:43:35,840 --> 00:43:37,840
I'm gonna find.
I fucking wonder.

783
00:43:38,040 --> 00:43:40,320
Yeah, it's insane.
Imagine people.

784
00:43:40,520 --> 00:43:45,720
Well, you wouldn't nowadays, but
imagine you you can't correlate

785
00:43:45,720 --> 00:43:47,640
the amount of pain and
suffering.

786
00:43:48,260 --> 00:43:52,420
That they hollerated.
Oh yeah, compared to today.

787
00:43:52,420 --> 00:43:56,620
I mean, it's you can't even.
It's unfathomable when we never

788
00:43:56,620 --> 00:43:58,020
talk about it, right?
OK, we don't.

789
00:43:58,020 --> 00:44:02,220
Even just not having heat and
air conditioning and a castle.

790
00:44:02,460 --> 00:44:06,540
I would be on the verge and like
that was their luxury, was like

791
00:44:06,580 --> 00:44:09,020
the castle with the cold damp
walls.

792
00:44:09,020 --> 00:44:11,860
And like there was no like
laundry machine to give you hot

793
00:44:11,860 --> 00:44:14,660
towels.
You know, like even that alone.

794
00:44:14,660 --> 00:44:17,620
And then ah, like they didn't
have pain meds back then.

795
00:44:17,620 --> 00:44:19,420
No.
Yeah, they had wine.

796
00:44:20,020 --> 00:44:22,540
Yeah.
No way that was like cooked in a

797
00:44:22,540 --> 00:44:24,300
lead basket to.
Make it.

798
00:44:24,340 --> 00:44:27,740
Sweet.
And no Snickers to Curb Your

799
00:44:27,740 --> 00:44:29,700
hangriness, right?
Right.

800
00:44:29,700 --> 00:44:32,180
I mean just all the things that
you think you know, it takes for

801
00:44:32,180 --> 00:44:33,620
granted.
Like, I'm so messed up in the

802
00:44:33,620 --> 00:44:34,660
head.
You were like, oh, she was so

803
00:44:34,660 --> 00:44:36,060
sad.
She was pacing the halls.

804
00:44:36,060 --> 00:44:37,940
I'm like, why not get in bed and
watch TikTok?

805
00:44:37,940 --> 00:44:39,820
And then I'm like, oh, right,
Like, that's what you do when

806
00:44:39,820 --> 00:44:41,820
you're depressed back then.
That's like the only thing you

807
00:44:41,820 --> 00:44:45,300
can do is wander the halls.
You wander ghost like a ghostly

808
00:44:45,300 --> 00:44:48,060
apparition.
Yes, Ghostly spook.

809
00:44:48,260 --> 00:44:50,220
Go around your frowns, yeah?
Real.

810
00:44:50,780 --> 00:44:53,180
Totally.
So that's kind of my tutor death

811
00:44:53,180 --> 00:44:55,820
story.
That was some crazy shit, but

812
00:44:55,820 --> 00:44:57,420
this.
Really makes me wanna watch the

813
00:44:57,420 --> 00:44:59,500
tutors.
Or like a YouTube video about

814
00:44:59,500 --> 00:45:01,620
how the tutors are related to
Game of Thrones.

815
00:45:01,620 --> 00:45:04,020
Or all of these different?
Stories.

816
00:45:04,020 --> 00:45:06,540
Because I know that a lot of
different, like TV shows and

817
00:45:06,540 --> 00:45:08,380
movies have been based on this,
yeah.

818
00:45:08,740 --> 00:45:10,660
Have you guys seen that movie
that was talking about with

819
00:45:10,660 --> 00:45:12,620
Margot?
I've seen clips of it because I

820
00:45:12,620 --> 00:45:15,220
was like, how do they make
Margot Robbie like, look like

821
00:45:15,220 --> 00:45:16,380
that?
Yeah, you know, Yeah.

822
00:45:16,500 --> 00:45:18,340
No, you should watch it.
Does she look ugly?

823
00:45:19,100 --> 00:45:21,020
Well, Margot Robbie's hard to
make her look.

824
00:45:21,020 --> 00:45:24,260
No, she's so beautiful.
But you know, you do enough to

825
00:45:24,260 --> 00:45:26,340
make her look.
She's got like, the powdered

826
00:45:26,340 --> 00:45:28,060
face, right?
Like the Cool, Yeah, the.

827
00:45:28,060 --> 00:45:30,580
Hair up to the sky?
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

828
00:45:31,230 --> 00:45:33,230
I'll have to watch it.
Although I never, I never watch

829
00:45:33,230 --> 00:45:34,990
movies, so.
You don't.

830
00:45:35,190 --> 00:45:38,590
Know do what I do and find a
TikTok account that broke the

831
00:45:38,590 --> 00:45:41,830
movie down into 60 portions.
And then you just scroll through

832
00:45:41,830 --> 00:45:43,910
and you watch all 60 portions
and you're like, I do that.

833
00:45:44,030 --> 00:45:45,150
A film buff.
Literally.

834
00:45:45,990 --> 00:45:50,070
Yeah, I used to do it.
I think I have no patience to

835
00:45:50,230 --> 00:45:51,470
watch a movie anymore, so I'm
just.

836
00:45:51,470 --> 00:45:52,630
Gonna do that.
Good call.

837
00:45:52,670 --> 00:45:54,910
Yeah, They seem to be lasting
longer and longer.

838
00:45:54,950 --> 00:45:57,270
Well, thank you so much for
being on the podcast, Shannon.

839
00:45:57,270 --> 00:45:58,310
Thank.
You for?

840
00:45:58,430 --> 00:46:00,870
Oh my God.
Like I I just feel like every

841
00:46:00,870 --> 00:46:02,270
time I.
Your episodes I got so much

842
00:46:02,270 --> 00:46:07,430
knowledge but also a giggle.
Thank you.

843
00:46:03,950 --> 00:46:06,150
Like I love everything you guys
are doing.

844
00:46:06,150 --> 00:46:09,270
Thanks for having.
So tell anyone who's listening

845
00:46:09,270 --> 00:46:11,630
where they can find you what
you're doing, what you're up to.

846
00:46:11,710 --> 00:46:15,470
The podcast I host is called
Fluently Forward, where big on

847
00:46:15,470 --> 00:46:19,070
TikTok Instagram also at
Fluently Forward and you guys

848
00:46:19,070 --> 00:46:22,190
are going to be on for an
episode all about castration.

849
00:46:22,270 --> 00:46:23,550
Yeah.
Really.

850
00:46:23,790 --> 00:46:28,190
Looking forward to hear you,
yes.

851
00:46:32,550 --> 00:46:33,310
Well, thank you.
Yeah.

852
00:46:33,310 --> 00:46:34,470
Thanks.
Again, thank you guys.

853
00:46:34,670 --> 00:46:35,310
Pleasure.
Yes.

854
00:46:35,590 --> 00:46:37,910
And we'll see you next week.
Yeah.

855
00:46:38,230 --> 00:46:39,310
OK.
On the flip side.

856
00:46:39,310 --> 00:46:40,310
Thanks, bye.