The Bizarre AF News

0:00 Broadcasting from the edge of reason and the heart of the unknown, this is the bizarre AF news. Each month we will bring you tales that defy gravity, logic, and sometimes basic hygiene. From ghostly glitches to cosmic chaos, these are the stories they don't want on the Evening News. So light a Kendall, charge your crystals and brace yourself because the veil is thin and the headlines are bizarre AF. Well, hello and welcome to a brand new news flash. This just in, you know.

1:10 The breaking news FAP? Yes. Bizarre FAP. I mean it, it sounds like an impressive acronym, doesn't it? It does. So actually, you know, Kevin and I were talking about ways that we could kind of bring in into the world some of the weird, strange stories that wouldn't necessarily, like, be a full episode but are happening currently and I think kind of warrant a little bit of an overview. Yeah. Yeah. So we're going to, we got a few stories of mine. I got some pull in mine right from the AP Associated Press.

1:50 So there's our AFAP stuff, man. I mean for real, I will say that not all of my sources are AP actually I don't think one of them. So it'll be a good back and forth. So now many of our listeners are not going to think this is bizarre AF. OK, really I. Just think it's unreal. You think it's unreal? OK, OK, OK, let's hear it. Albany, NY A news anchor, Olivia Jackwis, she's recently goes to her newscast, starts the newscast, her water breaks.

2:32 Live on news. Live on the air and it's like my water just broke. So I just want to let you know, and I'm just going to keep reporting. Shut up. She did the entire. Kept reporting her Co host is like girl can you go to the hospital? So I don't know. I think I'm just going to keep reporting. She's like I, I, I'm not going to get on maternity leave until I have to. Clearly, she wanted every second of it. Yeah. I think that's nuts. I mean, it is nuts. And this was in Albany, right? OK, can we just get can we just like say the elephant in the room? We live in a culture that does not allow that is is way more, you know, appreciative of a workhorse work.

3:20 Is more important. Then birthing a baby. Birthing a baby and she's think, she, I'm thinking her mind, she's just thinking, well, I'm fine, I don't need to worry about it. And by the way, it's our first baby. It is her first. Baby. Which is weird. I mean for. Our first baby. I think maybe by the third you're like whatever. So I guess like as the more that you have, I don't know. I've not had a baby and I'm not planning on that. So I can't really speak to it. I have been in the room where it happens. But normally after, like your your first one, it's a lot faster. But it does take time. It takes time. It's not like, you know, you, your water breaks and then a baby just slips right ahead. Yeah, there's a whole process that has to happen. Yeah, exactly.

4:01 God bless girl. Yeah, so she she had a baby boy, apparently. Quincy. It's his name. But I'm sorry, girl, I'm judging you. Go to the fucking hospital. Your life is more important than work. Also, can we talk about how gross it is to have like someone's water on the ground, right? Now she was reporting her. The floor was covered in her juice. Her placenta. OK, so next news story, we are going to talk about a former Bush aide that came out to talk about. It was actually the former Bush housing official claims the government has spent $21 trillion building an underground doomsday base. Now, this was a former White House official who worked under President George W Bush.

4:55 And she said that there was there's a there. They spent years, the US government spent years funneling money into a, into the creation of a secret underground city where the rich and powerful can shelter in the event of a near extinction. OK. This was Catherine Austin Fitz, who served as the assistant secretary of Housing and Urban Development for housing between 1989 and 1990. She actually made the shocking claims during an appearance on the former talk show host Tucker Carlson, his podcast. And of course, the Internet is having a field day. There are no there's no concrete evidence to support her claims. But she she's originally from Philadelphia, and she actually cited research from Michigan State University's economist Mark Skidmore, who had released a report in 2017 stating that he and a team of scholars had uncovered $21 trillion in unauthorized spending in the Departments of Defense and Housing and Urban Development during the years of 1998 to 2015.

6:08 So. You know what's interesting? No, not interesting. What's sad is completely plausible. Yes. Well, OK, we did talk about DIA and how DIA has an entire underground system, right, And a baggage claim that was how expensive. Right. And it never worked. Right. There's something up there like that's weird. Yeah. It's never worked. And if you're talking to me about your my favorite airport, DIA is definitely fucking not it. I can, I, I'm saying it and it's within earshot of me, Curt.

6:49 Literally. But you know, there are a lot of movies that where they build doomsday bunkers and only the rich and the select chosen can go. Exactly. That's why I. Seem completely plausible. So I mean, here's The thing is, is would it be surprising? And also what if there is? I've heard, I have heard some, some speculation that there is a comet or an asteroid that's supposed to be coming pretty close to the Earth and perhaps it's actually going to be very a lot closer than then we are being told.

7:33 And if there is a mass extinction event, an asteroid would that's large enough could be, could be definitely part of it. And so guess what? I'm not going to be part of that underground bunker. Nobody's inviting me. I'm not getting, I'm not getting the golden ticket. And even if I did get the golden ticket, you're going to be stuck with a bunch of like I. Don't know. Psychopaths. I would want to do that. No, we are partying. I don't like people as it is, and then you get down there with those people. They're the worst. People. To the no, they're the worst of the worst. They're they are are selfish. I was thinking about this. These people were the last people and are the only people to like move forward and like continue humanity. They're the worst.

8:17 You know you don't want people who are like money hungry and like egocentric and willing to kill each other to get ahead. Quite literally. Being. Trapped underground with them? No thank you. No, thank you. No. Scranton, PA. Oh, I know, Scranton. A former medical Harvard Medical School morgue manager admitted in his role in theft and sale of human body parts, hands, feet, heads. Heads. Heads. Good God. Cedric Lodge 57 Cedric Excuse me Lodge 57, Goffstown, NH, pleaded guilty Wednesday in Pennsylvania to Interstate transport of stolen human remains. He could face up to 10 years in prison. Thefts from the morgue and bought from Boston occurred in 2018 through at least March 2020, authorities said. He, his wife and others were part of a nationwide network of people who bought and sold human remains stolen from Harvard and other Mortuary in Arkansas.

9:33 That's so gross. Several defendants pleaded guilty to various charges stemming from the scheme, and prosecutors have said that she negotiated online sales of several items, including two dozen hands, 2 feet, 9 spines, portions of skulls, 5 dissected human faces and two dissected heads. Gross. How much is OK? Can we just like, talk about? How much is it worth? Yeah, yeah, like how much do you get for a head? Right. And and yeah, what are you doing with it?

10:15 That's a fucking great idea because at first, I'll, I'll be honest with you, the first thing I thought of was, oh, well, these are just people who are like, you know, medical students or maybe it's like a school. You can't get a body or cadaver or something. But then the way you asked that made me think there are some very nefarious things that people are doing with these body parts. I don't know. I mean, what have you said to me before? Men are pigs. Yes, exactly. That's all I can say. That is so gross. OK, so our next story is from the Times of India, friends, the AP of India.

11:01 No, it definitely is not. It's not, but the title reads Lost drunk man spends hours helping search team Helping a search team look for himself. OK. In a bizarre incident from Turkey, a 50 year old Behan Mutlu inadvertently joined his own search party after wandering off from a night of drinking with friends. He was reported missing by his concerned friends and they, you know, the local police quickly organized a search effort to comb through the forested area. Mootlou, who was unaware that he was the person everyone was looking for.

11:41 He came across the very group that was searching for him and decided to lend a hand. Oh my God. So he joined the volunteers and police, walking through the forest for hours, helping call out his own name without realizing that he was the subject of the search. Oh my God. The confusion came to an abrupt end where one of the searchers called out Behan Mutlu and Mutlu responded without hesitation. I am here. At that point, a rescuer took him aside to get the details and understand what was going on. Don't punish me too harshly officer. My father will kill me, the 50 year old man said. Well, it's unclear that if any other or any official action was taken against him, police reportedly drove him home safely.

12:36 So it actually this story has gone viral. It happened on Wednesday and it may not have been the rescue that the team expected, but at least the guy was found safe. Good Lord. I am here, he's just calling his own fucking. Name. I would have slapped him right across the face. Yeah, I could see that. A content distributor, I think it's King Features is the name of it. They fired a writer recently who used artificial intelligence to produce a story on summer reading suggestions. The problem is that the books that have been that list didn't exist. Come up with a book with a summer reading list. OK the dog that could stupid.

13:31 Hey I give me give me fun sounding summer kids books. So you didn't ask for actual books? The list appeared in Heat Index, Your Guide to the Best of Summer special selection distributed in Sunday's Chicago Sun Times. In the Philadelphia Inquirer last week, more than half of the books listed were fake, according to the piece's author, Marco Baskalga, who admitted to using AI for help on his research but didn't even double check what was produced. Lazy a hole. OK, can we just say friends please? If you're going to use AI, which I get it, it's easy, it's great. It can be super helpful.

14:17 Fucking check what you're. No, because what it says is true. No matter what it says, it's true. Oh, you know what? I've heard that. Like when you're interacting with AI, you have to tell it to not be agreeable. You have to. It doesn't hallucinate. Or so it's not sending you. Or like becoming an echo chamber chamber so you can look up ways to actually make it not be agreeable. Gotcha. Because friends, if your AI is always telling you exactly what you want to hear, there's probably a problem, right? Period. Right, right. God. Stupid. OK, so my next story is a story that I think is probably one of the biggest ones that we've heard in a long time.

15:00 This is a recent report by News Nation journalist Jeremy Korbel. We know all about him. He does UAP stuff. He's worked with Congress alleges that AUS government agency ignored A whistleblowers claims regarding unidentified aerial phenomena. Korbel, like I said he was he's known for his work on UFO related documentaries, assets or asserts that the whistleblower provided credible information about UAP encounters, which was subsequently dismissed without proper investigation. He emphasizes the need for transparency and accountability and handling such reports, suggesting that neglecting credible whistleblower accounts undermines a public trust and hinders the pursuit of understanding these phenomena. Now, you might be asking, OK, there's nothing big coming out of that.

15:49 What is it? Which whistleblower? This is Matthew Brown. Remember the episode that we did? I think it was the beginning of this year, the end of last year. Who spoke about the Immaculate Constellation? Matthew Brown was one of the writers of this. Paper. He found it. He also helped leak it. And he was supposed to come forward at that original Pentagon, that Congress hearing, but he was very nervous. And when we were talking about that hearing, we talked about how it seemed like there was something up and there was Matthew Brown was too nervous. He did not come forward. He was supposed to be the big whistleblower but did not feel protected enough to come forward.

16:34 So the issue now is that he has come forward and. Why now do you think? I think there is we could do an entire episode based off of this one, just him coming forward, Matthew Brown, just in general. Jeremy Korbel has a podcast that he is. It's called Undisclosed. Anyway, definitely worth listening to. I think he is now coming forward because the time's time's ticking. And that's basically what he said. He said he had the kid had done everything right, Jeremy Corbell.

17:18 And he has not received the support that he should. So he didn't come forward when he was supposed to go to talk to Congress. Congress now knows this. And Matthew Brown says that he has inside knowledge of the deception of our government by elements of the intelligence community. So. We've said this 100 times, that that's there's too many people that know the truth at this point. I mean, and we're talking about, you know, thousands of photos and videos that the American public has not seen of these advanced craft AKAUAPS. Now, Matthew Brown does say I invite everyone to to watch this.

18:00 He does say that there are a few things that he's learned. One, we're living in the Matrix. Oh. My God, no, no, do not say that. I'm just reporting the news, baby, that's all I'm doing. That we're living in the Matrix, but it's just a much more boring version of it. And God is real and that there are people around who are trying to help us forget who we are and wait. How does God come into this? You and I are going to after we're done with this, I will this please. We'll have it in the show notes. Wow, this podcast, it's worth listening to and worth watching Matthew Brown's face because this is a dude who looks. We need to do an episode on him.

18:46 Terrified. We need to do an episode. Absolutely nuts. So in London, a man tried to help a burglar cash in from a theft. They sold a golden toilet valued at £4.7 million. Who the? Fuck owns that? What? Yeah, but he was spared jail on Monday after the British judge said that he had been taken advantage of by the thieves. So Frederick Doe, 37, also known as Frederick Signs, was given a suspended sentence at Oxford Crown Court for his role in helping to sell the 18 karat gold fully functioning toilet which was taken in 2019 from Blenheim Palace, the country mansion where British wartime leader Winston Churchill was born.

19:39 Those responsible for this heist. 5 individuals could be seen on CCTV were clearly intent on disposing of their I'll gotten gains quickly. The judge said you foolishly agreed to assist. So this toilet was part of a satire art installation titled America A Golden Toilet. Nice Italian conceptual artist. Did it and he who he. He's the also one that did the banana to the tape wall. Yes. He did that. Oh OK, yeah, infamously fucking stupid.

20:19 Stupid golden toilet. Golden fucking toilet. So I have another one. OK OK, so a kindergarten in the Greater Johnstown, PA school district brought treats to school on May 14th. This is WJCTV reported, which is great. Unfortunately, the tasty items were jello shots with alcohol that three fellow students enjoyed. I bet when the school officials learned about the shots, immediate action was taken with the kids going to the nurse's office and then to a local hospital for evaluation. Out of an abundance of concern, the district said that it was working with authorities to find out how the student came into possession of the shots.

21:09 I wonder, maybe they were in the fucking refrigerator. Been a. Long time since we've had a good jello shot. I know, I know, I love a jello shot. So here's my last story. On May 14th, a traffic monitoring camera in a Swiss town was triggered by a fast flying duck breaking the speed limit. Shut the. Fuck up. But here's what's even crazier about it. OK. Exactly 7 years to the day that exact same thing happened in the exact same spot at the exact same speed. OK, we are living in a much more boring matrix.

21:53 The speed camera was triggered last month on April 13th and captured an image of a male duck traveling at 32 miles an hour in a 12 mile an hour. And I should actually I have a picture. I don't, I didn't save it, but it's the did you see the picture of this duck? He's like flying through this intersection. I wonder if they're going to send him a ticket. And on April 13th, that was a 2018. And then on April 13th, 2018, the exact same speed was clocked by the exact what they thought was to be the exact same duck. At the. Exact same time and day. What the hell? This is OK. That's deja vu in the matrix. Exactly. Exactly. It's a glitch in the matrix.

22:34 It is a. Glitch in the matrix. It is the cat meowing or moving again. Yes, exactly. Much, much more I OK, so I I'll do I'll do one more. OK, so authorities in Delaware County, Pennsylvania have arrested 44 year old Christina Solim Solimetro of Ridley Park after a crappy incident on April 29th. This was NBC Philadelphia that reported it. Silmetro and another driver took part in a road rage event that ended with Silmetto exiting her car, backing up to the front of the other car and defecating on the front grill. Oh my God.

23:15 As seen on the in a witness video, she then walked triumphantly back to her car and drove on. She was taken into custody on May 1st and charged with indecent exposure, disorderly conduct and harassment, harassment and depositing waste on a highway. Oh my God. What is wrong with people? A lot. A lot. That's really the answer. Just a lot. It, it is, it is so ridiculous. It's so ridiculous because for someone to so blatantly do that, you know it's not the first time it's happened. That had to have at least been the second time at least. Yeah, this didn't just pop into her mind. Yeah, and what do you do?

24:00 Get really angry and take a shit. Who thinks of that? Oh my. God, it's sick. It's just, it's a bizarre world. World. Wow. OK, well there's your crazy news for the month. Enjoy, enjoy. Friends and stay safe and you know, remember, we might be in the Matrix. Right. Think about that one. Seriously. OK, bye.

25:03 Music.